I wonder if anyone’s ever got divorced because of a pair of shoes, because I am seriously considering it. My husband hasn’t done anything wrong, but if I get divorced then I can re-marry, and if I re-marry I can have a big white wedding and wear this pair of Christian Louboutin satin peep toe shoes, £395, because they are the most beautiful pair of shoes I’ve ever seen. Drastic action, I know, but I’m sure it will be worth it.

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